A few chosen words

Sometimes, a few chosen words can mean so much. As I said before, they have to be followed by actions. And when they are, there are possibilities.

What does a Dom see when a sub speaks? A chance meeting, a glance, eyes meet and a shock is felt. Does he know as well as she?

She sees in him possibilities. Possibilities of that unique relationship, that coming together that she dreams of, the intangible circle of completeness that she craves.

What does he see? Does he see her power? her longing to serve? Does he see the possibilities?

They meet, they talk and talk some more. Each probes and thinks, examines and engages the other. A relationship does not grow in a moment, but all it takes is a moment to start.

Submission is given

Submission is a gift. It can only be given, not taken or demanded.

Let me explain, one can force someone to submit in the physical sense. Force one to obey through fear. But that submission drains power from the oppressor.

True submission is given freely and increases the power of the Dominant. Crucial to this is that the sub is made complete. Subs and Doms can and do live happily and fully. But the completion of the circle, submission given and accepted lifts both to a level that cannot exist without each other.

There is a catch. Once the gift is given, it must be accepted and cared for so that it may grow deeper and the circle become stronger. A ring, a circle, a collar.

The deeper the submission, the stronger the Dom and the stronger the complete circle.

Words

What are words? A way of expressing ourselves, of saying what we think. Words can explain scientific facts or explain the beauty of a sunset. Words can encourage and words can hurt. Words can convey thoughts and feelings and intentions.
But words are easy. It is easy to say something, it is easy to find just the right word to make someone take notice, or someone look away .

Words.

Say what you mean. Say what you are. Say what you feel.

Words.

Words have no power without actions. Words are like a leaf in the wind. Here one moment and gone the next unless the action is behind them.
It is easy to learn words. And it is easy to say words. It is not so easy to do words. To say what you mean and then to do it.

Words.

Say I love you. Say it 1000 times. Say it again. What is it? Said and gone. Love me, that is harder to do.

Words.

Words can be weapons. Words can hurt and destroy the fragile soul of a sub. Measure your words, speak slowly. Follow the words with an action.

Throw out words. Make them sound good. Use them to soothe, to hurt, to teach or to tear down. It is the action that makes the words have meaning.

Don't tell me you love me. Show me.

Speaking of Doms

So listen up Doms!!

I talk alot about what a sub wants an needs. That is because I have those wants and needs. What does a Dom want? I can only speculate I suppose.
A Dom wants to dominate. Oh that was easy.

What does that mean? He wants to take the will, the mind and the body of another and mold, bend, shape and use for his pleasure and her fulfillment. Does that sum it up? Am I on the right track?

Why? Because he can.

What does a Dom want and need? I can't say for sure. I can only speculate. He wants respect. He wants to know that his sub holds his wants and needs above her own. He wants to know he will be "taken care of".

WHOOOAAA!!!!!!!!

Taken care of? Does he want that? Is there a human being that does not want at some point to be taken care of?

I have been told that being with a sub can calm the mind. Being with a sub can free a soul, Being with a sub can inspire creativity.  Is this not being taken care of?

What is it that a sub does for him? Each one is different, each one is unique and only the two, Dom and sub can define the relationship.

It only stands to reason that where there's sacrifice, there's someone collecting the sacrificial offerings. Where there's service, there is someone being served. The man who speaks to you of sacrifice is speaking of slaves and masters, and intends to be the master. Ann Rand

What do subs dream of?

What do subs dream about? How many times am I asked "What do you seek?". How I struggle not to give pat answers, the easy ones.

What do I dream about?

I dream of that Master that sees the wonders of my soul. The Master that seeks the pleasure and the joy I will bring him.

I dream of that Master that will learn me and seek to fulfil my needs. The needs I am aware of and the needs I have not discovered yet.

I dream of that Master that will ferret out my flaws. He will bring them to the surface and lead me to confront each and every one.

He will not settle for anything less than all of me. It will be glorious, it will be painful and it will take me to places I have never been. And through it all, He will be there leading me, pushing me, and holding me when I need it.

Through it all, He will find pleasure in shaping and joy in the blossom.

Beyond My Best

You hold me in a world of love
Engulfing me with warmth
Taking me beyond all I know
Raising me beyond my best

Taking hold of my weaknesses
And turning them into strengths
Making me more than I could hope
Raising me beyond my best

You lead me through play and sceneing
The pain and love takes hold
Pushing my boundaries all the way
Raising me beyond my best

In life and in love my Master
Showing me how to cope
With what life has been dealt to me
Raising me beyond my best

Today and then tomorrow
Now and in the future
I know you will keep me growing
Raising me beyond my best

author unknown

Submissive Power

Submissive

Power

Two words that seem to not fit together. Submissive is to yield, if you yield you are not strong. A submissive yields as a choice, think about how strong that must make her. She knows she has power, she knows she has strength. Yet, she CHOOSES to yield that to a Dom. She takes her power and gives it to Him to add to the power He has so that they both can benefit. What amazing strength that must take to see that which we know we control, released and given over to someone else to control.

“In the world there is nothing more submissive and weak than water. Yet for attacking that which is hard and strong nothing can surpass it.” Lao-Tzu

The Master

Are you a soft and gentle Master?

Or a cold unyielding Lord?

Will you treat me to pains

And pleasures alike;

Those I am familiar

And those I’d like to explore?

Do you have the patience to teach me new things?

Can you watch me,

Learn my subtle cues?

Will you listen;

Listen to my words, my heart?

Talk to me, I will listen.

Listen to me, I will obey.

Luna

A poem found in many sub's journals I am sure. But what does it mean?  Does she really not know the answer to the questions? Or is this that initial "talk"?
What is she looking for?

Does she know what she needs? Does she know what she wants? And the Dom she is talking to, what can he respond?

Read it again.

I think she is asking him if he will explore her, if he will seek out that which she needs and guide her to it. After all isn't that what a good Master does?
One Master suggested it was like watching a flower blossom.

What she offers is the bud, will he seek the full bloom?

What is a sub?

I have been challenged to answer this, by one that does not think I am a sub. And he is right, I am not his sub.

What is a sub? What does it mean to me?

It means that I know who I am, that I know what I need and that I know have the power to fulfil my needs. Oh, then you might say, that does not mean you are a sub, you can do it alone.
No, that is not what I said, I said I have the power to fulfil my needs, and one of those needs is the need to surrender to a powerful man, a Dom.

It is a power exchange, I surrender my power to him, I give him what I am to mold to his will. But how is that fulfilling my need? I trust him, I trust him to learn what I need and with his power and mine combined to take care of my needs. I trust him to take my body, my soul and my mind to raise what we are separately to new heights.
It means I am vulnerable, it means opening myself to him to allow him inside. It means trusting him to take me places I may not want to be, but where I need to be. It means being there with me.
Wow, a lot of words and alot of work. Yes, it is just words until you have felt that feeling deep in your belly, deep in your soul that you belong to him and you will go where he will take you. Lot of work, lot of responsibility on both he and myself. And a lot of trust, I need to know that he has my best interest at heart, that caring for me is his priority because that is what gives him the greatest pleasure.

I give him my focus, my thoughts, my needs and desires. He gives me his control and with that control frees me to be the person I was meant to be.

Two sides to a coin. Without submission there is no domination. He needs me as much as I need him. The perfect symbiotic relationship at it's best. Does it always work that way? No, we are human, and we make mistakes. We let feeling rule sometimes and the little gremlins we all have inside.

But I trust that he will conquer that and take control. I trust that he will use me to fulfil the desires of us both.

I want to feel his presence with me all the time. Be it a collar or a look, or a tone of voice, I know I belong to him. And I want to be no where else.

.........and so it goes

Things change day to day, and it seems minute to minute.
It is difficult to deal with change for a sub. We like some sense of stability. Some sense of continuity. When that changes, we are lost and spin out of control.

That spinning is dangerous to the sub's soul and has the ability to create bitterness and a coldness that never existed before. The sub then looks with suspicious eyes on everything. If we are lucky, we catch ourselves and work our way through it.
If we are unlucky, we fall to the ground and are shattered. Harder still to pick up pieces.

...........continues

When I look back on the journey many things come to mind. I am not the same person. I learned alot and lost a little of the polish.
What I remember most is the sheer ecstasy of the moments of perfection and the absolute pain of defeat.

Will I do it again? I don't know. There may be a Dom out there that can earn that trust and respect that I need to let go again. One that is strong enough to grasp me and drag me with him to hell and back. When and if I find him, I will think about it.
Just kidding...... if I found that, there would be no stopping me.

How can a woman whose entire natural instinct be to submit to a master not submit to a man whose entire natural instinct it is to dominate?

Fear.

We have all had moments of wonderful ecstasy and moments of utter defeat. Once you commit, the need to is momentarily taken care of, but it requires daily nourishment. Without that , the doubts, the unsettled feelings take over and if not stopped in their tracks, destroy the devotion.

Fear.

Should that stop us from looking for what we need, what we crave, No, but it does put a level of caution that may not have been there before.

Fear

Remembering failed relationships. Should that enter into it? Not always, but we are all victims of our past. We can learn from it and grow. Or we can repeat the same mistake over and over. Or we can understand what is that makes us what we are, accept it and deal with it.

Fear

What if?  What if I am not good enough? What if I am too good?  What a great name for a puppet, What If. We are human. We will make mistakes and we will fail. A strong relationship moves past that and grows stronger.

Surrender

Harder to do than it sounds. Let go of the fears.

Journey to a collar

A collar symbolizes  the trust, honor and respect that both the Dom and the sub are responsible for. It is a commitment one to the other. Many have likened it to a wedding ring, but it is more than that. The sub making a decision that she will give her being into the hands of a Master, to use , to mold for the mutual benefit of both.
SO why a journey?

It is not something to be entered into lightly. Their is a great deal of responsibility involved for both the Dom and the sub.
It is funny, some people put more research into choosing a pet than in the person they commit to.

A collar is about commitment, a promise that Master and sub make to each other. A responsibility that each bears some burden in the relationship.