Communication 3

“ I know you think you understand what you thought I said but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant”
― Alan Greenspan

How often this is true! Communication is based on a mutually understood language. Again, written, spoken or gestures, but how often to we realize that although we speak the same language we don't understand a word that was said.

Listening is important. What is listening? To listen, you must put aside ego and let your defenses down. You have to be in the moment. So many times we listen and are composing in our heads our response to what we are hearing, not what was meant, but what we heard.

Think about trying to sing while someone is telling you the words to the next line. Sure, you get some of it, but the melody suffers along with the rhythm. You lose the meaning of the song.

Try an experiment, the next time someone talks to you. Make you mind blank and look them in the eyes and watch what they are saying.

Let me know how it works!

Communication continued

In any relationship, communication is important.
It can be as simple as a command to a beloved pet or complicated directions to a co worker, we communicate everyday.

We use both types of communication, we transmit and we exchange. We tell the store clerk what we want for example. We call for an appointment and exchange information.

In a D/s relationship, one would tend to think we would use both types of communication also. But I disagree. In any intimate relationship, we communicate by exchanging information. In the D/s relationship that is most finely tuned. The exchange, as in the power exchange, is always there. That does not mean it is always good. There are many times it is a destructive exchange, especially if it is not completely open.

Communication

Communication is a word that is tossed around all the time by those that would give advice on relationships.
What is communication and why is it important enough that everyone has an opinion on it?

Strictly speaking, communication is:

- an act or instance of transmitting

- information transmitted or conveyed  
- a verbal or written message
So speaking to someone or writing to someone is communication. But is this is the communication we are referring to when we talk about communication in a relationship.

Another definition is:
- a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behavior
- also exchange of information 

This involves an exchange. This is the communication we refer to in a relationship. An exchange of information, in a variety of ways. It can be the spoken word or the written word, and also signs or behaviors.